The Food Suitor

By Rebecca Hill

I never knew his name. He'd come in to the lobby occasionally, bringing boxes of weird rotting fruit "for the Jesus People!" He was a little hard to look at, and even harder to stand next to. I'd try to be gracious, he was pretty harmless, but he'd stand there and stare. I tried to look in his eye (he was missing one) and smile, and he'd stand there with this goofy grin. Once I shook his hand and wound up with some unidentifiable viscous slime on my palm. Charming.

Then one day he brought me a Whopper. "Extra mayonnaise," he said as he watched me. "Thanks," I said. He was apparently waiting for me to eat it. I inspected it thoroughly and took a bite. He beamed at me. "I like you," he said. "You have an appetite!"

This became a daily ritual. He'd be peering in the lobby window. "Rebecca, your friend's here. What is he, Russian?" "No, Hungarian I think." I'd go out and sit by him and eat his gift of fast food. He'd watch me with admiration and affection, saying things like, "In my country, we like big women!" Great. Glad to hear it.

I'd wonder about him: where did he sleep, where did he get the money for hamburgers? He seemed homeless, yet he'd rather watch me eat than have a meal himself. Now it seems strange that I never asked him, but the lines of our relationship seemed so clear-cut. There were times when it was hot and he reeked, and I could barely choke down what he brought me. But it made him happy.

But in the end it wasn't enough. I walked past him in the yard talking to one of the brothers, saying, "I bring her Whoppers, I bring her Big Macs, still she does not love me!" After that I didn't see him for a long time, maybe three months. Another street person said he went to the county psych hospital. I saw him out on the street, and it was snowing. I spoke to him and he looked at me, not recognizing me, and shuffled away.

It was a truly strange mixture of unrequited love and food obsession that drew us together that summer. I hope wherever he is he's warm and safe, and he has a big woman to share his food with.