I remember my mother telling me that Christians, real ones, were not racially prejudiced. Perhaps when she said it she really thought so. Personal experiences, mine and others, suggest that what we think we believe and what we really believe don’t always match, especially when it comes to interracial marriage.

My husband, Eric, and I were invited to a friend’s wedding in Bolingbrook, a fairly wealthy Chicago suburb. As we mingled with the crowd entering the sanctuary, I tried to ignore the stares and whispers. And when we greeted those in the receiving line, I watched a woman flinch and withdraw her white hand from my black one. I made a quick powder room stop and while there, talked about fingernail polish with a friendly redhead. Meanwhile, Eric went to the reception hall and located a table with two empty chairs. The four couples already seated assured him there was plenty of room. When I arrived, Eric gallantly pulled out my chair for me. Was it my imagination, the slight hush? As we sat down, all eight people at the table got up and reseated themselves elsewhere. Eric and I sat alone in the crowded room while I asked myself if this could really be happening.

“I can’t believe it! How rude!” said a loud and irate voice from across the room. It was the redhead I’d met earlier. “You come sit over here with us!” She grandly led us to her table overflowing with a raucous but friendly crew. They made us feel welcome and accepted.

In 1970, only 1.5 out of every one thousand marriages in the United States were between blacks and whites; by 1990, the figure was 4 out of every one thousand marriages.[1] Surveys conducted by the National Opinion Research Center of the University of Chicago have indicated that tolerance for interracial relationships is increasing. In 1972, 39 percent of whites said that interracial marriages should be illegal; by 1991, the number had dropped to 17 percent. Acceptance of interracial marriage is higher among blacks, but by no means universal. In 1980, 20 percent of blacks thought that interracial marriages should be banned; by 1991, the figure had dropped to 7 percent.

Though the statistics seem to indicate that interracial marriage is becoming more acceptable for both blacks and whites, down in the neighborhoods where the social rubber meets the road things are not so ideal. In Jean Elster’s “When Violence Hits Home,” she relates a frightening incident.

Jean and her husband, Bill, had moved into an inner-city neighborhood in Detroit while Bill was pastoring a church located about a mile away. When that ministry ended they decided to stay in the neighborhood. “Given the nature of our marriage—he is white; I am African American—it was important to us that, though the residents were primarily black, there was still some ethnic diversity among the inhabitants of this area.”

On their way home one evening, a car drove by and then stopped a few yards in front of them. As the driver began to back up they pulled their children behind them. The man spoke to Jean, “Are those your children?” They continued walking and the car matched their pace. “Is that your husband?” Bill responded for her, asking the man how he could help him. The driver interrupted him, “I’m not talking to you, I’m talking to your wife.”

The driver got out of his car. “My Lord,” Jean prayed quietly, “don’t let this man have a gun.” A heavy fist landed on Bill’s jaw. “This is what I think of white men who marry black women!”

“The children were screaming as I rushed to scoop Isaac up in my arms and hug Elizabeth’s face to my chest. The man strode back to his car and drove away while Bill lay sprawled on the cement, blood streaming from his face, his eyeglass frames knocked off, the glass within these frames broken and shattered.”

After Bill got up and helped his wife calm the children, the Elsters knelt down and prayed for their attacker. “We prayed that the hate within him would be healed and that he would repent. The longer we prayed, the calmer the children became. We were not afraid; we did not want revenge.” Later that night, in the emergency room, the cut required seventeen stitches.

“Some listeners ask, after hearing our story, ‘Was he black or white?’ And, we answer, ‘Bill’s attacker was black.’ But our family understands, and you understand, that hate knows no color.[2]

But could Christians be so prejudiced? Cornerstone undertook an informal survey of its own, calling pastors from our Chicago inner-city neighborhood and some Chicago suburbs. We contacted between five to ten churches in each of fifteen different denominations, asking the following seven questions:

1. Are the majority of the members of your church/parish born-again Christians according to the Scriptures? (Matt. 22:37-40; Mark 8:34-73; Luke 24:44-48; 1 John 2:22-25)

2. What is the racial/cultural makeup of the majority of your congregation?

3. What percentage of the members of your church are from a different race or ethnic background? (European, Asian, Native American, African American, Other)

4. If a (insert church’s smallest racial percentage represented) became a member of your church, would cross-racial dating be discouraged? Why or why not?

5. Does your church have any interracially married couples?

6. Which statement do you most agree with?

a. The Bible teaches the races should remain separate.

b. The Bible allows and has demonstrated interracial marriages.

c. The Bible is silent on the subject of racially mixed marriages.

7. What biblical support do you find for your answers?

The study included predominately black, white, and Hispanic churches. A few churches we contacted were racially and culturally blended. Of the pastors who completed the survey, all clergymen, with the exception of one, believed the majority of their members to be born-again believers.

Most of the respondents claimed one to three interracially married couples in their congregations. Only one pastor believed that the Bible teaches the races should remain separate. He responded, “Mixed marriages are an abomination!” Most supported the belief that the Bible allows and has provided examples of interracial marriages. It would appear, at least from our probing, that most believers are open to interracial relationships, at least in theory. In fact, as Martin Luther King once noted, in America Sunday morning has often been called the most segregated hour of the week.

Some Christians openly teach racial separation. “We believe that God made races as they are. He made black people. He made yellow people. He made white people. We believe God intends for those distinctions to remain. That’s not racist.”[3] These words capsulize the racial theology of Bob Jones University, a “fundamentalist” school in Greenville, South Carolina. Bob Jones lost its tax-exempt status in part due to its public statement that upholds and maintains a policy openly discouraging interracial relationships and supporting racial separation.

Sociologist George Yancey writes in “The Bible and Interracial Relationships”: “The argument that the Bible condemns interracial relationships can be simplified in three basic arguments. The first is represented in the . . . statement made by Bob Jones [University]. . . . Adherents to this argument point out the story of the tower of Babel (Gen. 11:1-9) to support God’s will that the races remain separate.”[4] A more careful reading of this passage would note the separation was made by differing languages, not races. The teaching on Genesis 11, according to the Bob Jones hermeneutic, should contend that learning a new language is sinful.

A second argument uses the Old Testament prohibition against Israelites marrying Gentiles (Deut. 7:3, 1 Kings 11:2, Neh. 13:25). Proponents of this view point out that such intermarriages even affected the success or failure of the nation. Yancey counters by saying, “God is not trying to avoid having an impure race, but rather an impure faith.”[5] The New Testament verse “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers” (2 Cor. 6:14) underscores Yancey’s point.

In the Old Testament God apparently displayed disgust toward those who criticized Moses’ interracial marriage to an “Ethiopian woman.” When Miriam, Moses’ sister, questioned the rightness of his marriage, she was struck “white” with leprosy (Num. 12). It is hard to miss the irony.

When people of the “nations” were willing to worship the God of Israel, they were accepted without discrimination as to skin color. The Semites of the Bible were surrounded by Cushite (Ethiopian) neighbors to the south, Asiatic neighbors to the east, and Caucasian neighbors to the west. Religiously speaking, the Caucasians were as “Gentile” to the Jews as were the Ethiopians. Naomi’s Moabite daughter-in-law Ruth was committed to Israel’s Jehovah, which validated her acceptance among the Jews. Of course, Ruth was a part of the lineage from Adam through David to Jesus. In the New Testament, Paul taught that Jesus had broken down the barrier between Jew and Gentile, spending his whole ministry with the nations around Israel.

Yancey urges us to “remember that the ties of Christianity bind Christians together no matter what their racial origin.”[6] Interracial marriage is not only not forbidden in the Scriptures, we should note that such unions can have a positive value in being “a reaffirmation of God’s desire to tear down barriers of hatred and mistrust that have developed between the races.”[7]

Mistaken doctrines like the Bob Jones theology concerning race are to be expected in a fallen world. Biblical ambiguity is not caused because God was not clear in His revelation. Biblical ambiguity exists because biblical interpreters are men, subject to fallen passions and prejudices. The theology of racial separation creates a hierarchy of skin color that God never intended. Do any of the racial separation theologians hold their position because the “other” race is better than theirs and intermarriage would make them feel inferior?

Jesus said that tying a millstone around one’s neck and being dropped into the depths of the sea was better than what awaits those who cause an innocent one to stumble. When wrong doctrine causes the innocent to fall, it is a serious matter. Though some patience ought to be shown the racist, Christians must publicly distance themselves from racist theory disguised in biblical language.

The following letter, appearing in a 1995 issue of Interrace Magazine, reveals one young person struggling with such hypocrisy.

I am a devout Christian. Growing up, my parents taught me “there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all and bestows His riches upon all who call upon Him.” (Rom. 10:12) However, they encouraged me to marry a Christian. I am “white” and the man I love is a Christian who happens to be “black.” My parents, although they have never met my boyfriend, are against our relationship. They claim our “interracial” relationship disgraces them and God.

I am uncomfortable disagreeing with my parents openly. And I do not want to hurt them intentionally, but I have found no evidence in the Bible to support their claim. And the pastors I have spoken to have been unable to help me.[8]

When I began, I mentioned what my mama said. But that wasn’t all the story, because she said something else I need to pass on. I had called her to break the news about my relationship to Eric. “What’s he look like?” she asked. “He’s six feet tall, blue eyes --” She angrily slammed down the phone, but not before exclaiming, “Don’t bring him here!” I was hurt and disappointed.

Eric’s mother was also upset with us, but chose to talk with me about it. “I’m having a hard time with this black/white thing. How’s your family taking it?” When I told her they weren’t even speaking to me, she grew quiet, then wondered aloud if she should write my mother.

Eric and I continued plans for our marriage. Then, to our complete astonishment, our mothers had a surprise birthday party for Eric—at my mother’s house! Though there were some sharp questions from both our fathers (shades of Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?), we found our relationship being cautiously accepted. Eric’s mother, it turned out, had written mine and said in part: “I know my son loves your daughter very much. . . . As much as I hate to admit it, the Lord has been showing me that I have harbored bigotry in my heart. I know that is wrong.” My own mother’s heart responded to those words!

Sixteen years after my wedding day, both our families are close to us. We realize that it was the Lord who worked in our families’ lives. Five years ago, Eric’s mother went to be with the Lord after a final bout with cancer. But her ability as a white woman to confront the racism in her own heart is a testimony to God’s reality. She faced the truth about herself and, in reaching out to my mother, brought about racial reconciliation for us all. Like my mama told me, real Christians aren’t racially prejudiced. Or, if they are . . . they have to deal with it.

Sidebar: "A Very Incomplete History on Black/White Romance in America"

First published in Cornerstone (ISSN 0275-2743), Vol. 26, Issue 111 (1997), p. 24-26, 28
© 1997 Cornerstone Communications, Inc.
Electronic version may contain minor changes and corrections from printed version.